They're Male

           A very clever man I know once told me about how he was thinking about writing a book for people who wanted to learn how to move cattle.  He said that he kept trying to simplify it and simplify it, just to make it easier to understand. In the end, he told me, he summed it all up in just a few words, "They're female."
          Now you're probably wondering what this has to do with Tango, the Redneck, but I'm getting around to it. Today we went for a ride, it's been a while since we have, but I saddle him up despite the hot weather and we headed out.  Travelling across the hayfield we let ourselves into the back forty.  Deciding that today would be a good day for something new we went the opposite direction than we usually do.  Tango was a good sport when I urged him to go through the mud, with me on top crossing my fingers and praying that I wouldn't be inspiration for another Corb Lund song, this one titled "The Horse Got Stuck".
         Surviving the mud we continued on around the hill and followed the cow trail.  I was amazed at how steep the hill was but Tango was to distracted to notice, he was on a mission.  We must have been downwind of some interestingly scented object because he set off at a very fast walk.  Cresting a small ridge I spotted what had intrigued his nose, there were cows grazing in the river flat.  Now there is only one thing Tango loves more than oats, I would like to say it's me but sadly no, it's cows.
        The fence came to a corner, with the cows on the other side, we would have to go through a couple gates to get to them.  No matter how much I wanted to go see who's cows they were and no matter how badly Tango was chomping at the bit to go play with his new bovine buddies I decided it wasn't worth the trouble.  I turned him to walk up the hill along the fence but he turned back as soon as I wasn't paying full attention to what he was doing.
         Finally after a few minutes and a lot of determination on my part we made it to the top of the hill and I stopped dead in my tracks (well I guess Tango's tracks).  The hill on the other side fell away to a creek at the bottom.  This part of the creek contained a beaver dam so it go really wide.  Not thinking very clearly I decided to go investigate the water's edge.
         Well we got down there and found there was no way across and because Jessica was in a particular good mood she gave Tango his head when he decided he was gonna go "THAT WAY!!" (you can't see  but I am pointing in a general direction, although it's not really relevant because that wasn't even really the direction we were going in at the time, but I digress).  So he went that way, following a cattle trail throught the gorgeous bushes, just starting to turn color with the cold.  He went this way and that, weaving back and forth back up the hill.  For a while it was okay, the bushes were ankle height or shorter but then we started getting into where there were trees.
            Now I couldn't tell if he was doing it on purpose but he was going under trees with low hanging branches or brushing up against them so that I had to ride with one leg lifted up behind me if I wanted to keep the skin on my knees.  I don't even think Tango knew where we were going, but he seemed determined to go where he wanted to go.  Finally we came out on a slightly wider trail and I could breath again.  I thought Tango would be content to follow the trail for a while but nope, he saw another cow trail and was going towards it with unnerving determination.
            If any of you know me, you'll know that I ain't no pushover so that's where I drew the line. I said "No Tango we are staying on the wide, open trail. It's safer, even if it isn't the most direct route."    
             So he might of been right, that clever man, about cattle and they're female, and I admit we can be a little bit absentminded and exasperating but men aren't all that much better with their tendency to be difficult and determined to make the most direct approach, even if it's the most dangerous.  If I have to sum up riding in two words, as he did so perfectly for working cattle, I would simply say that although the majority are gelded THEY'RE MALE!

Unless you ride a mare, then you don't have to worry. Just have to watch out for the moodswings... right Autumn?